Molly Goatwax

No paper crown

Today is Jimbo's birthday! He told me yesterday that he invited all his buddies to meet him at Molly's for a celebration. I told him that if I had known ahead of time, I woulda gotten him a tiara! Oh well. We still have plenty of bubble juice and some umbrellas for Micheladas, if I can pry the Ozzy from his fist....

Big brother in housewares

I was cutting off the bulls-eye tags from tee shirts and socks for the nine year old when Hubby asked me out to lunch yesterday. In the car, on our way to our favorite rib joint, I told him how much I had spent for clothes, sprays, emollients and nostrums. Then I asked "Did you know Target has its own forensics lab?"*. Over lunch I told him how their Minnesota headquarters was doing pro bono work for the FBI and helping various community police departments with remote control patrol systems. They even track career criminals for repeat offenses. It's all loss prevention and asset control. He thought I was making the whole thing up, right down to the red logos on their high security crime lab. When we got home, I gave him yesterday's Washington Post, where the story was on the front page. I don't know whether to be amused or frightened by this development, but I know I won't be doing anything unseemly in their venues. What's next? Hooking their store surveillance to face recognition software to catch America's Most Wanted?

*some info

Neo-amish

I do not have a cell phone, an Ipod or an alarm clock. There are a few television sets in this house, but I don't view them. I haven't figured out the answering machine or how to play that fish shaped ocarina on grandmother's cabinet...I haven't figured out the scanner or how to hook my camera up to this computer, otherwise I'd show you hundreds of valentines, face down on the walk out back, getting a coat of latex for their journeys. I don't usually dwell on the negative, but I haven't gotten any e-mails with addresses to which they may be sent. So I'll send them all to Fred. That will confound him! I can't find my keys, either, but that's a different issue.

Funny

Do it your self, here.

Spectres

Somehow the president of the art school has been intruding into my dream space, again. I was giving him a tour of a modest neighborhood that I had improved, pointing out which houses were oldest and which had been restored. Fie Fred! Get out of my head! I think he's surfacing in my thoughts because I've been having more contact with my former colleagues, first running into M.J. on Charles street a few weeks ago, he's moved back to Baltimore from Boston, then Liz S. and Chris A. came to Molly's the other night! Without my glasses I did not immediately recognize Miss Liz in the dim bar light, it's been so long. We had a lovely catch-up over swill and shrimp. I stayed up too late and was slightly impaired the next day. There also seems to be a Meet-Up gelling for the 11th...more news will be posted as it develops.

That time

It's getting to be that time of year, boys and girls! Those of you who are on my mailing list make sure that any address changes since last year are entered in The Book of Mom by e-mailing them to me-hit the link at the side, please. Those of you who know what I want with your snail mail address and trust me with it, feel free to join in. Supplies are limited. Act today!

Boycott this

On December 30th, Concerned Women of America called for a boycott of Mattel and all Barbie products. Why? Not because Barbie promotes an unhealthy and unrealistic body type that plants self esteem issues in girls, not because Barbie no longer aspires to be a doctor, president or even a flight attendant, but because the Barbie website was offering "I don't know" as an option on the boy/girl question in its user poll. Concerned Women, get a life. Or better yet, channel that energy! Come to Baltimore and picket Jonathon Borofsky's Male/Female sculpture. Angry letters from art critics to the editors at the local rag don't seem to have budged it, why don't you get on your collective high dudgeon and picket this 51 foot giant monument to gender ambiguity that greets rail passengers' arrival? Not that I object to it on these grounds, or even much at all, but we could sure use the amusement. Then we'll mug y'all to refocus your priorities.

Happy Day

According to a Welsh health psychologist's formula, today is the most depressing day of the year. The Rochester Democrat and Chronicle reports that Health magazine has named tomorrow the most depressing day of the year. Well, O.K. Yes, it's Monday, and it's rainy, cold, dark and gloomy. It's been a while since Christmas and will be a longer while until Spring...but I don't feel particularly depressed. Is it because I didn't put myself in debt for gifts? That I didn't make New Year's resolutions I'm not keeping? Maybe. I think it has more to do with hot tea and cookies, getting enough sleep and the satisfaction that I'm doing the best that I can. Those cheeky Felix the Cat dollar store underpants on my rear don't hurt matters...but best of all...Miss Lis is coming to town in a few weeks! We'll see her at the Public House! She'll bring enough sunshine to illumine the darkest of days!

Mucking out

Yesterday was the anniversary of the Public House's opening, which I observed by getting down on my hands and knees with a flashlight and pulling out from under the fixtures Things That Smelt Bad. The sink trap got cleared and the hand sink scrubbed well, bleach was applied to the bathroom ceramics and bottle caps swept from the corners. Because the events of  the last few months overtook me, some of these tasks fell to the wayside. I will go back today and with assistance, as my back is still sore, continue a good mucking-out. Ah, but.....Hooray! Still afloat in beer after a year!!!

It's Friday!

I spent my lunch hour chasing down beer trucks so that the swillers at Molly's can have their favorite libation in stock. I will go back after I am released from the bank so that I can make sure that the product has uniform clarity, carbonation and mouth feel so that our client's favorite libations are up to our strict standards. Don't you wish I were your publican?

  unattributed, prize winning truck art e-mailed to me by Jules.